Hey Bond Squad peeps,
Let’s talk about something real—those heavy feelings of guilt and shame that can creep in when you’ve distanced yourself from a parent because of parental alienation. It’s tough, confusing, and can make you feel like you’re stuck in a whirlwind of emotions. But you’re not alone, and it’s important to understand why these feelings happen and how to deal with them.
Why Do We Feel Guilt and Shame?
When one parent tries to turn you against the other, it can feel like you’re being forced to take sides in a battle you never signed up for. Over time, you might start to believe the negative things you hear about the other parent, and this can lead to rejecting them—sometimes without fully understanding why.
Then, when you realize what’s happened, guilt can hit hard. You might feel bad for pushing that parent away or for not reaching out sooner. Shame might follow, making you feel like you’ve done something wrong by not standing up to the manipulation.
It's Not Your Fault
First things first: none of this is your fault. Parental alienation is a form of emotional manipulation, and it’s normal to feel confused or pressured. The guilt and shame you feel now are signs that you care about your relationships and want to make things right, but remember, you were put in a difficult position.
How to Handle These Feelings
Acknowledge Your Feelings: It’s okay to feel guilt and shame, but recognise them for what they are—emotions that you can work through. Accepting these feelings is the first step toward healing.
Understand the Manipulation: Knowing that you were manipulated helps lessen the burden of guilt. You were influenced by someone you trusted, and that’s not your fault.
Open Up: Talk to someone you trust about how you’re feeling. Whether it’s a friend, a counselor, or someone from our Bond Squad community, sharing your feelings can help you process them.
Rebuild at Your Own Pace: If you want to reconnect with the parent you distanced yourself from, take it one step at a time. It’s a journey, and it’s okay to move at a pace that feels right for you.
We’re Here for You
At Bond Squad, we get that dealing with parental alienation is tough. The guilt and shame are real, but so is your strength. We’re here to support you as you navigate these feelings and help you find your way back to the relationships that matter.
You’ve got this.
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